Balance

I always look at the beginning of a new year as a new start for great things - diets, exercise, cleaning my house, saving for adventures. 2018 was an enlightening year. I'm not much for even numbered anything and even numbered years tend to take the cake. 2018 was no exception.

When life is going to switch gears on me, the message is usually a gentle whisper, like the wind, blowing me in a different direction. Not this time. The message came screeching around the corner leaving me without a doubt that it was time to listen. That happened in 2016 as well, when the best half of us woke up to a guard rail and found himself in the car floating across lanes of highway before dawn. (Definitely not a whisper). 

We've had growing pains, health issues, defining moments...all that good stuff that happens in a house with teenage humans. We've also had an evolution of self, as we're both searching for what brings us joy in our professional lives. 

I'm not sure that the joy is entirely missing, but the balance is. We can feel this on a long weekend, when there's enough time to get it all done and slow down enough to enjoy each other. When we're able to eat home cooked food together in the same place at the same time. When we're practicing self-care and enjoying our health, instead of trying to keep up and squashing the symptoms with meds. 

I've thought for a long time about balance. It seems like the last page in the parenting guide. The thing they forget to tell you about. Focus on success, family, bigger - better, bigger - better, but balance -- balance is what gets lost in the process.

So, we're on the path to balance. Something simpler. Being able to get it all done, spend some time with each other, and sleep. Crazy idea.

I'm starting with what does not bring me joy. That was easier to come up with. Things that I put a whole lot of effort in to, that bring me zero joy. I'm kicking those things (and people) out the door first. And, I'm adding more of the things that do bring me joy - being outside, being with my people, being flexible and free with my time, and focusing on who, not what. That's a big ask.

I think the hardest part of this is that to let joy in, I have to let stress out. Let stress go. For me, this is letting people and commitments that aren't working, for commitments that are. That's work of the heart. Letting go to hang on to something entirely unknown and unfamiliar, yet simple. 

I'm beginning to think simple is not easy. It may not even be less. I'm just hoping it's food for the soul. 

What am I diffusing this week to launch us in to joy? Douglas Fir and Bergamot to calm the soul and wrap us with positive energy. It's amazing how just a change in scent in the environment can activate the mind and our emotions in different ways. This is our favorite, never fails diffuser. We find our favorite oils here. 

Slowing Down

This is the beginning of something different. It took some false starts (blogging ain't easy, y'all) and a lot of longing for the life we want to build, to get to this place. It's a little scary trying something new, but I think you'll enjoy our adventure.

I've never been one to shy away from change. This wanderlust spirit of mine almost demands change, on the regular. Then came the 40s. It's amazing how a few short years can have you feeling like you don't know what the hell you're doing with yourself and also very wise, wrapped up together with a nice little bow. Things hurt, bodies change, spirits are free, and I think I'm starting to understand why people adjust their way of living when they get to this mid-life thing. I look back and think, whoa, that was one hell of a ride. And, I look forward thinking, yikes, is that really where I'm headed.

That's how we got here.

Forty brought on some strange things. One of which was this desire to be a creator. Another was togetherness. I like to be alone, that's where I get my energy, but I also need to bring my people together and hold them close. The other, trying to figure out how my connection to the earth became so tattered. My energy, my immune system, my joy factor - all seem a little out of whack.

We've been climbing that proverbial mountain for some time now and at the top, there's a nice view, but the constant isn't making my heart happy. I think a lot of you find yourself just where I am, but stay that way.

So...what if I stopped climbing and just enjoyed this place? What if I rerouted the entire journey and took a new adventure?

What if, we change everything and do only what brings joy to our lives?